I'm Not Mad, I Always Look Like This

Some day I'm gonna spring for charm school, or sumthin' like it.  You'd think it hurts me to smile, wouldn't ya?  I have my reasons for looking a bit perturbed... all shall be revealed.

So here we are in Barnes & Noble and I AM slightly pissed off, come to think on it.  I arrived at the Mazda store at the appointed time and was the first guy there.  So far, so good.  Then it all began to go downhill from there.  First of all:  no wi-fi.  Well, there IS wif-fi, but it ain't for the payin' customers and only one person in the entire establishment knows the access code and she has the day off.  Say what?  That was me, really, asking the not-so-rhetorical question about the wi-fi.  Yeah, I find the answer hard to believe in this day and age, especially in auto dealerships with service departments that specialize in rape and mayhem to your bank account.

So there was that about the lack of wi-fi.  Then the really bad shit hit the ventilating device, and I'm talking about the violence to be done to my wallet.  I knew goin' in that I was gonna get bent over a barrel when it comes to the price I'll pay to get everything done that needs doin', dealers bein' dealers and all that.  The service department lady sat down with me about a half hour after I checked in and said she "wanted to go over a few things" to make sure I understood what it was gonna cost to have all this stuff done.  I steeled myself for the litany of charges... and they ARE egregious... but she still managed to shock me: 65 Yankee Dollars to replace four spark plugs.  That was too damned much... and I came slightly unglued.  I told her I could buy spark plugs all day at Advance Auto Parts for two and a half dollars each, or less, which comes out to about ten bucks for four, worst case... if I'm doing the math right.  She smiled wistfully and said the cost of the plugs was only 12 dollars, the rest bein' labor, which cost she would graciously waive, given the amount of work I'm having done.  "Thank You" was about all I could manage.  The rest of the bill?  That's measured in the thousands of dollars, plural.

And now you know why I look like I do today.